Proof of life
And my wish for this new year
Hello again,
I wish I could tell you that I’ve been “offline” since 2022, discovering the magic of the every day as I remained blissfully screen-free, happy, fulfilled, Enlightened, and whole. But that would be a lie.
My so-called sabbatical has been spent, not on some new passion I needed time for, but on figuring out where my passion actually lies. And step one was to rehydrate after burning out so badly that I wanted to (and kinda did?) throw it all away. Rather than force creative output to grow my practice, or feed social media, or increase book sales, or trigger my own dopamine release, I just did less.
Actually, I did almost nothing. I ignored my work, letting emails and tasks pile up.
For a month or two in the Spring, a huge box of merchandise sat on my floor, “inventoried out” from the fulfillment warehouse I no longer needed, but too heavy (literally and metaphorically) to deal with. Finally, I opened it to find 400 star ornaments and a single “NOTHING MATTERS” patch on top. I laughed.
It would be so nice if this next paragraph offered a neat little takeaway, a bite-size AdamJK® aphorism to encapsulate all the “transformative” growth I’ve done in the last year as an offering to you. But have I even transformed, or am I just more myself?
The truth is that one day you hate yourself, and the next day you can’t wait to use your gifts. One week you’re nursing a big dumb crush and the next you can’t believe you ever felt that way. One month you’re having a great summer and the next you have a painful eye thing that makes you look like a cartoon villain and hurts constantly (it eventually healed but wow that was rough).
Eventually it’s Christmas, and then it’s New Years, and then maybe you’re ready to write an email about everything you’ve learned about yourself, your place, your goals, and what might come next. Or maybe you don’t feel the need to anymore.
The excitement of a new year has me excited to begin again. I am looking forward to the future and hope to have a tiny part in yours once again.
✏️ My wish for all of us in 2024:
I hope that 2024 brings a sense of fresh energy. I hope that if last year was hard, it taught you new skills and strength to carry forward. I hope that if there’s something you’re working on, or waiting for, that it all comes together soon.
Most of all, I wish you the time and opportunity to root down into yourself. Not necessarily tethered to anything external, but to become more grounded in your personhood so that you may continue to grow up, out, and ahead.
After my own period of rooting, I’m getting back into the idea of regular creative practice. But I don’t know when I’ll write my next newsletter or share my next Instagram post. There are no plans for a new book, no job opportunities on my radar, no speaking opportunities scheduled. I have no desire to “go back” to how I worked in 2022, but I will never not be this person, wired to experience the world around me, to find something special in the pieces, and try to create something from it.
One thing I did make is a 2024 wall calendar in the same mini size I did two years ago. I made it for friends but it’s one of those things where the printer requires a larger order so now I have two boxes of extra calendars and I thought you might like them.
They are $7.77 and all profit will support my local volunteer dog park. Shipping is free (domestic only). They’d be zero dollars but I’m trying to break even and also the dog park has become a big part of my life in the last year and it is a very special place.
I have already been packing the envelopes and feeling that special connection through the mail again, which I love. With each piece of mail I send a small part of my heart and soul to you and if that sounds corny or cringe, too fucking bad, life is cringe! 🥰
📹 About that burnout… from the Q&A at an artist talk I gave to college grads in November.
Thank you as always for being here, and I hope you’ll choose to stay with me now that I’ve moved to Substack, which has some cool features to explore in the future.
Also now we have a comment section! I’ll see you there. 👇
-Adam
Happy to hear from you Adam JK! It's reassuring to hear that you don't have a tidy lesson from your sabbatical. So often it's not about needing to learn new lessons but relearning the old, and to nurture the selves we've been before but forgotten about.
Listen, I didn’t open my email in enough time to get a calendar, and that’s sad but it’s also ok. I love your work and I say a break is great. I took a break from Instagram 3 months ago and decided to never get back on again. Now I just read newsletters I subscribe to! Take care!
Nicole